I appreciated the specific detail about the country (the cooks and drivers, the traffic) and also the analysis of the inevitable rise of the goons. Really love the online post style; fits the story perfectly and tone rings true.
“Merit got us into this mess”, and the certainty with which he says it, hit me like a freight train.
For some reason this reminded me a little of Naghib Mahfouz and his Cairo Trilogy. The threads of personal relationships wrapped up in regimes swaying back and forth.
I have never read anything quite like this and found it utterly compelling. The best realist work I've seen in a year. I don't even like realism, but this held me all the way through.
I also felt I'd gained better understanding of the life of the upper class in Bolivia, which to a large degree mystified me.
I'm not an artist with words, so I can only say that this piece has that ineluctable hotness to it. So good. In my humble little opinion, this is the kind of short story that should be winning awards. But award-giving bodies would probably need more literary sophistry and superficiality to be convinced. With your increased clout now, I hope that changes.
This story shows me a lot of my own country, and of Pakistan, and of certain Southeast Asian nations. That does not matter, of course. As you write, this pattern is prevalent in many countries right now.
I'm curious about how you balance the limits of the persona's POV and interiority. From what I've seen, people with this persona's background and self-awareness often make it a point of pride to rebel: to refuse the prestigious American schooling, to refuse the position offered by Anwen's father, to refuse to join the bullies. Let's face it, there is no real personal benefit for the persona to to go against the tide; only ego would. But other than his teenage horniness, the persona does not seem to have much of an inflated ego or sense of grandeur. Yet he has reached the point where he can see the inconsistencies and lies, even in his own parents' denial. There are also no indications that he was previously involved with more "grounded" people. So where is all this hyper self-awareness realistically coming from?
Or maybe I'm demanding too much realism. I'm reminded of O. Henry's "The Poet and the Peasant." I'm trying to curb the poet's habit now and learning to write like the Conants of this world who make bank.
I thought about this comment a lot. You're right that people _like_ the narrator of this story usually _also_ have some kind of bitterness or resentment, and that it's not totally realistic that he wouldn't have these things.
But I think he's just an ideal. He's what I would hope that someone could be like.
"Under real fascism, when you mention the word 'fascism' people will either do one of two things: a) fall silent and ignore you; or b) immediately start arguing with you about the meaning of the word 'fascist' and all the many ways your own society doesn't resemble Hitler's Germany at all."
Is this already option b) ? 😋
Or would you argue the speaker is confused and not the author?
Sure, it’s true that people can use “just asking questions” disingenuously. But pointing to that fact can’t be used to completely shut down an important issue like whether someone accusing people of fascism knows what the term means. Particularly in this case where the word is used a zillion times without a nod to a sense of what it means, let alone a definition.
Starting around 2015, people brandished the words fascism and Nazi in a completely indiscriminate manner. “Anyone I don’t like is a fascist.” So I have no scruples about asking for a hint of precision.
I should also point out that it’s ludicrous to say that under “true fascism,” like the regime of Saddam Hussein, people get into arguments about the meaning of the term – they’re too scared. They avoid politics, except when they’re forced to show loyalty to the regime, which they duly do. 🤦♂️
I appreciated the specific detail about the country (the cooks and drivers, the traffic) and also the analysis of the inevitable rise of the goons. Really love the online post style; fits the story perfectly and tone rings true.
Thank you! I really appreciate that =]
Does this occur within the "Unbearable Lightness of Being in Aberystwyth" extended universe?
LOL
reading about fascism is definitely more palatable when it's wrapped up in a teen romance!
I know right :)
“Merit got us into this mess”, and the certainty with which he says it, hit me like a freight train.
For some reason this reminded me a little of Naghib Mahfouz and his Cairo Trilogy. The threads of personal relationships wrapped up in regimes swaying back and forth.
Fantastic story.
Thank you so much! I have read a little Mahfouz, but I should read more =]
Cairo trilogy is very good, I remember a lot of it ten years after reading it. Ahead of its time in some ways. But also a commitment, a real tome.
I have never read anything quite like this and found it utterly compelling. The best realist work I've seen in a year. I don't even like realism, but this held me all the way through.
I also felt I'd gained better understanding of the life of the upper class in Bolivia, which to a large degree mystified me.
Thank you! It really means a lot to hear you say that.
I'm not an artist with words, so I can only say that this piece has that ineluctable hotness to it. So good. In my humble little opinion, this is the kind of short story that should be winning awards. But award-giving bodies would probably need more literary sophistry and superficiality to be convinced. With your increased clout now, I hope that changes.
This story shows me a lot of my own country, and of Pakistan, and of certain Southeast Asian nations. That does not matter, of course. As you write, this pattern is prevalent in many countries right now.
I'm curious about how you balance the limits of the persona's POV and interiority. From what I've seen, people with this persona's background and self-awareness often make it a point of pride to rebel: to refuse the prestigious American schooling, to refuse the position offered by Anwen's father, to refuse to join the bullies. Let's face it, there is no real personal benefit for the persona to to go against the tide; only ego would. But other than his teenage horniness, the persona does not seem to have much of an inflated ego or sense of grandeur. Yet he has reached the point where he can see the inconsistencies and lies, even in his own parents' denial. There are also no indications that he was previously involved with more "grounded" people. So where is all this hyper self-awareness realistically coming from?
Or maybe I'm demanding too much realism. I'm reminded of O. Henry's "The Poet and the Peasant." I'm trying to curb the poet's habit now and learning to write like the Conants of this world who make bank.
I thought about this comment a lot. You're right that people _like_ the narrator of this story usually _also_ have some kind of bitterness or resentment, and that it's not totally realistic that he wouldn't have these things.
But I think he's just an ideal. He's what I would hope that someone could be like.
This is just plain wonderful -- otherworldly but right here and now. You managed something truly difficult.
Thank you! I really appreciate that. This story is my baby so I am happy to see some people getting it.
Not convinced you understand what fascism is.
To quote the text:
"Under real fascism, when you mention the word 'fascism' people will either do one of two things: a) fall silent and ignore you; or b) immediately start arguing with you about the meaning of the word 'fascist' and all the many ways your own society doesn't resemble Hitler's Germany at all."
Is this already option b) ? 😋
Or would you argue the speaker is confused and not the author?
Sure, it’s true that people can use “just asking questions” disingenuously. But pointing to that fact can’t be used to completely shut down an important issue like whether someone accusing people of fascism knows what the term means. Particularly in this case where the word is used a zillion times without a nod to a sense of what it means, let alone a definition.
Starting around 2015, people brandished the words fascism and Nazi in a completely indiscriminate manner. “Anyone I don’t like is a fascist.” So I have no scruples about asking for a hint of precision.
I should also point out that it’s ludicrous to say that under “true fascism,” like the regime of Saddam Hussein, people get into arguments about the meaning of the term – they’re too scared. They avoid politics, except when they’re forced to show loyalty to the regime, which they duly do. 🤦♂️
I spent a summer in a dictatorship and this felt pretty real to me.
Real fascism:
https://youtu.be/CR1X3zV6X5Y
Yes that is real fascism. The story posted here is fiction.
I have the weird belief that when you write fiction, you should still use words correctly
Love this narrator, and I can hear his voice. His country is so familiar!
Thanks =]