How beds, coffee, steaks, and whiskey are governed by the Kanakia Theory of Manly Preferences

Love this oddly apropos meme that I found... (source: hotmeme)

Once upon a time, I walked into a Mattress Discounters in search of a new bed. And the first person that the salesperson asked was, "So, do you prefer a firm mattress or a soft one?"

And I was like, "Firm! The firmer the better! I can't sleep a wink when I'm on a soft mattress!"

And he said, "…